Going Straight Lyrics

Thanks to Andrew Welsh for supplying these lyrics to Going Straight.

All my life I've been..
bent as a corkscrew, bent as an 'air pin
bent as a figure eight.
Bent as a wish bone, bent as a bed spring
now I'm bent on Going Straight.

I'm goin' straight, I am,
Straight as an arra'
I've paid the price and done me time.
I'm goin' straight, I am,
Along the straight and narra'
And I don't mean straight back to crime.

I'm going straight, I am,
Straight up, I swear it,
Though I hate to disappoint the boys in blue.
I'm goin' straight I am,
They'll have to grin and bare it
And find something worthwhile to do.

The day I was born on a winters morn'
I was cuddled and kissed
but in that moment of bliss,
The midwife looked at me fist
"Its clenched so tight.." she said
"..For such a tiny thing."
She didn't realise
I'd nicked her wedding ring!

All my life I've been
Footloose and feckless,
Rowdy and wreckless
Blaming it all on fate.
Never relenting,
now I'm repenting
Just before it gets too late.

I'm goin' straight, I am,
Straight as an arra'
Bein' bents habbits I'm about to kick
I'm going straight I am along the straight and narra'
Cos I ain't going back to no nick!

(whistling)

now I must admit
when I think of it
that it wont be a game.
It was always the same,
you give a dog a bad name.
Some geezer robbed a pet shop, just last week,
I was pulled in on suspicious, what a flamin' cheek!
(spoken) Anyone wanna buy a cockatoo?

All my life I've been..
bent as a corkscrew, bent as an 'air pin
bent as a figure eight
bent as a wish bone, bent as a bed spring
now I'm bent on Going Straight.

I'm goin' straight, I am,
Straight as an arra'
I've paid the price and done me time.
I'm goin' straight, I am,
Along the straight and narra'
And I don't mean straight back..
and I don't mean straight to crime.

Porridge | The Unofficial Homepage of the BBC Sitcom and its sequel, Going Straight